The trail.

Posted on Categories fiction, Writing for fun

“Time of death is estimated to be around one AM cause of death is unclear at the moment,” Larry said.

“The absence of a struggle, blood trail and appearance of the general area suggests the murder occurred in a different primary site. I want the site searched thoroughly,” Sergeant Lucas said.

“Any idea how the body ended up here?” Officer John asked taking a closer look at the body.

“It would appear to have been dropped from a height most likely the bridge; there are bruises on the impact areas along with cracked ribs. Most of the damage seems to have occurred post-mortem though,” Larry replied.

“Who placed the nine-one-one call,” the Sgt asked

“Lady in the running outfit over by the patrol car, stumbled upon it on her run,” Officer John replied

“Try to clear the scene as soon as possible, the senator won’t like having us in his neighborhood for long,” the Sgt. said turning to leave.

Something about the site taunted his every step.

Written by Chioma I.N

In response to the writing challenge flash fiction for aspiring writers hosted by Priceless Joy click on the link to visit the blog. The photograph was provided by Dawn Miller and we are challenged to write a 100 – 150 words (+/- 25 words) story inspired by it. Do click on the link for other stories.

Thanks Joy for hosting it.

Thank you for stopping by.

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Published by creatingahome

Welcome to my blog, Its lovely to have you here! I am Chioma and I like to think of myself as an avid reader and a non biased writer.I got married and joined my partner to start our own little new home miles away from family (*tears*). what are my ideologies: I am a strong advocate for maintaining balance and modesty in every area of life. I believe everyone is entitled to their opinions but they should never be forced on another. I strongly agree that you are allowed to shout your views at the top of your lungs, just as I am allowed to totally ignore them. However it is my belief that in order to create a home far from the familiar environment one must make certain compromises. Not compromises that change who you are or your principles but those that allow you live at peace with the neighbours. That said, I hope my page brings a whole new perspective to living under a whole new climate. Thank you.

32 thoughts on “The trail.”

  2. I found this to be a good story until the last line. To me, that line is telling the reader (and murder/mystery readers do not like to be told, we like to figure it out on our own).
    I hope you don’t mind me saying so, and I wouldn’t critique you so harshly, if I didn’t think this story had great potential.
    I would edit it to say something like: “The Sgt. recognized this MO and the victim. He now needed to figure out how the two were connected”.

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  6. Good take on the prompt. I like how your story flows with the conversation between medical examiner and police. Not too sure about the last line. I prefer leaving it mysterious for me to think about. 🙂

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  10. I really enjoyed reading your story, Chioma, but it leaves me with a lot of unanswered questions (as so many of your stories, do.) That’s a good thing in many ways, but the ending of this one perhaps need a clue or two. I like the dialogue very much, and it flows well, although you should, perhaps, try writing it without so many tags. (If you’re not sure what I mean, you can always email me. <3) Overall, you've created a very good crime scene. 🙂

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  11. An enjoyable story with some interesting dialogue, Chioma. I really hope they manage to catch the killer. I hope you don’t mind me saying – be careful with your punctuation, you’re missing a few commas and a full stop. I like your final line, though it should be ‘taunted’ rather than taunting. 🙂

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  12. I really enjoy your story and the more I read it, the more I think it’d be a good continuation for mine especially the part about a lady in running outfit reporting the crime. She must be shaken up by what she saw. 🙂

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