Happy new year

Happy new year!

I guess in every sense of the word it is indeed a new year for me as a blogger. Today marks my fifth year on WordPress. I haven’t been ‘actively’ around in the last 2 – 3 years, life has happened, life is happening and I am sure it will carry on happening for a long while yet. But before I get carried away to the land of reminiscence permit me once more to say, happy new year again!

The last few years have been filled with so many lessons to learn and many more to unlearn. As 2020 arrived, I had only one request on my heart, to have perfect vision. To see the obvious, to decipher the hidden and to lead my heart to better days. January is almost over, there are lessons to be reviewed and thoughts to be weighed.

Lesson one: stop overthinking. When something happens, accept your responsibility in the sequence of event, admit the culpability of others involved. Overthinking: trying to decipher others intent without speaking to them, often this leads to gossip or to wish you could get back at them. Determine: to take the lessons learnt or steps discovered forward. To see people as humans who are either whole, broken, insecure, arrogant or just plain toxic.

Lesson two: accept that confidence and self- confidence are not necessarily the same things. Accept that many people don’t necessarily know the difference between both terms. Acknowledge that most people in today’s world consider the extreme of confidence i.e. arrogance to be the confidence. knowing one’s weakness in an area is not a limitation in all areas. It is self-confidence to know one’s weakness, to accept the implications of this weakness, to decipher if they’re changeable or not. This limitation should not drive you to over-compensate in other areas. Everyone has weaknesses. Simply decide: to put in your best at all times, to continually learn, to grow your strengths and develop your weaknesses were possible. Determine: not to base your sense of worth on your performance in front of others, you’re an individual not a character in a play.

It is confidence to know when to walk alone and when to walk with another.

In 2020, Balance is key.

Goal: to always see the woods for the trees.

To know what counts each day, each season and to max out the counts.

Happy new year again!

What have you done with your year so far?



No contrast.


broad of hip and bosoms

spongy hair, bushy brows

lips that are full in form and words

quick to dispel every hardiness.


trim of hip and bosoms

stringy hair, thin brows

lips that are narrow in form and words

quick to describe every emotion.


modest of hip and bosoms

Silken  hair, flowing brows

lips that are thin in form and words

quick to defend every injustice.

colored by nature for no one is colorless, designed by nature for no one is a mishap

colored by words as such is the nature of man to assign a label.

Women they’re, different in form like squares and circles, same in purpose as figures reflecting an eternal being. Like a pair of shoes with a varying range of sizes: the maker, factory, design and material stays the same, only the size varies suiting the path it threads to destiny.

Image source: Pixabay free images.

There is no contrast here, only comparison by one who questions only the label and not content, vision or purpose.

Daily prompt contrast

The conference on purpose

A few days ago I wrote an article on purpose for a friend who was organising a conference in Ibadan Nigeria. I am happy to inform you that the conference was a success and this post is an update on it. Click here to read the article on purpose.

The conference is the first in a series projected to take place each month across schools in Ibadan. Targeted at primary and secondary school students, the conference aims to improve students general performance, self-awareness and outlook to life. This conference had three speakers and about a thousand students in attendance.

IMG-20160128-WA0008Mrs. Mayowa Emordi was the first speaker, she addressed the topic; how to discover your purpose. She defined purpose as the reason for an individuals existence…the special  influence you have on people around you. Purpose gives you a sense of fulfilment. Fulfilment means to fill a need or want, your purpose should fulfil a need, which in turn makes the world a better place than you met it. She went on to say that discovering purpose early in life helps the youth contribute effectively and efficiently to the country’s economic development. We discover purpose by reflecting and answering these questions: what do you want your greatest achievement to be? When you die what do you want to be remembered for? What need do you want to meet? When you have answered the above, go a step further by asking yourself if you would be happy to do what it takes to make those answers a reality everyday. Does your passion lie in those activities?
She concluded by encouraging the students to write down a personal vision statement and to set smart goals in line with this vision, an act of commitment to their purpose and future.

IMG-20160128-WA0037The second speaker, Mrs Ola Ayanleye spoke on the topic: high retentive capability in teenagers. She asked the students to imagine someone wearing a red shirt and then she asked them to describe what they saw. A simple exercise aimed at demonstrating how we make use of our minds through the day. According to her high retentive capability is achievable in three stages:
One, the conception stage, at this stage the student develops a mental picture by reading or studying things around them.

The second stage also known as the action stage requires the student to write down their mental picture and read it consistently.

The third stage is the confidence stage, at this point the pictures of what you have read should come easily to you. Following these steps will ensure you get excellent results reflective of the efforts you put in.

IMG-20160128-WA0038Mr. Fawole Oluwakayode was the third and final speaker. He touched on how to shun distractions and avoid peer pressure. Defining distractions as things that interfere with one’s concentration on a goal, he urged students to shun environmental and technological distractions. He explained that a student’s goal should be to excel academically, vocationally and spiritually, anything that detracted from that goal was a distraction.

He also defined peer influence  as an influence from others usually those within your age group. There are two types of peer influence, positive  and negative peer influence. He defined positive peer pressure as an influence that motivates you to do something good while negative influence motivates you to do something harmful to yourself and others. He said teenagers found it difficult to resist peer pressure, because they feared being rejected or excluded by their peers. He encouraged the students to take a stand for what was right, to remember that each individual was at some point would have to face life on their own and if they didn’t learn to do so early in life, they would find it harder down the track.

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In conclusion, the students were charged to cease the day and to take responsibility for their futures. To take their studies seriously as it could play a strong role in their quest to fulfil purpose and excel in life.

All three speakers are graduates with a passion to improve the prospects of the Nigerian youth. There are definitely areas for improvement including better management of students welfare, better locations and post impact/sustainability measurement etc. However, as Rome wasn’t built in a day, I congratulate the speakers for taking the plunge and investing in Nigeria’s greatest resource – its youths.

Purpose again.

Lately I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, reading and writing on the word purpose. As an undergraduate I think the word had the worst impact any word could ever have on my life. It scared me, it confused me and I think it sparked those reactions because of the message it conveyed. People made it sound like it was a definite end, a point you must find or else your life would become meaningless. While there is some truth in that I fear the real message of purpose has been lost; discovering purpose means discovering yourself. A friend of mine is organising a youth conference on purpose back home in Nigeria and she’s asked me to write on the topic, this is what I have written.


Definition: the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists.

As a teenager I found it hard to relate to this seemingly big word called PURPOSE and as an adult it still doesn’t seem very clear what this thing called purpose is. However, I have learned certain facts about purpose from life and the above definition and I would love to share them with you:

1. Every individual on earth was created to live and increase life (make life better) for those around them. We are designed to leave an impact anywhere we find ourselves and the idea is to make that impact a positive one. Ideally this should be everyone’s purpose.

This means no bullying someone else, no gossiping and no lying e.tc. Your purpose in life wherever you are should be to enjoy life and be grateful. By enjoy I don’t mean just going to parties or doing things your parents will not approve of, NO. I mean staying happy, positive and constantly learning new skills through life. It also means making life better for those around you, by sometimes putting their needs ahead of yours.

2. Secondly I have learnt that purpose is something you discover gradually by doing things consistently overtime. This means that purpose is not something the lazy, careless or scared person will discover early. You have to start early to try out different skills and with everything you learn or discover about yourself write it down and keep making more discoveries. Join debate clubs, football clubs, writing club etc. In that shop or business you help your parents or guardian to manage ask yourself questions; do you like helping with the business, if you do why, what makes it fun? And if you don’t also ask yourself why?

3. Purpose has no time limit, but your capability/strength does: now I am not writing this to scare you, but it is the truth. Some of us never fully understand our purpose until we’re much older ?(myself included) especially in our country Nigeria where a lot isn’t done to help the process, but thankfully this conference should start the wheels spinning in your head. It’s important that we find our purpose while we still have energy to chase it and also earn some money. Everyone’s purpose is different, but one thing is the same for everyone it requires hard work to fan that purpose to success. So why not start early.

Success is a fruit/evidence/end result of fulfilling purpose, being successful however does not automatically mean you followed your purpose. Many young people (myself included) mistake wealth or fame to be success, but that is wrong. True success is accomplishing your own life purpose. So if your purpose in life is to become a wealthy business, a doctor, a tailor, a wedding planner then fulfilling that purpose makes you successful. When you chase your purpose things greater than money will find you. In all you do always remember point one make life better for you and those around you.

Take what you learn from today’s conference, study it, think on it and let it shape your purpose, your future.

Don’t give up: get scared, get worried, it will make you more careful and perhaps wiser, but never ever give up.

Purpose defined

As a teenager what would you have loved to hear about purpose?

What did you understand about purpose then, has it changed?

Quote on purpose.

As you might have noticed, I seem to be preoccupied with the word purpose lately. Today I came across a sentence that struck a nerve whilst reading a post over at Peter Wells blog aka counting ducks. He writes some amazing reflective pieces, do click on the link to discover the source of this quote and much more.


Picture and background courtesy  creatingahome.

The quote is an excerpt written by Peter Wells in the post Yesterdays promise.

What are your thoughts?

Thanks for stopping by.

Life is … #11

Life is … a cotton boll.

A single one seems insignificant, but within it lies the potential for so much produce.

Put together with another, the potential multiples.

What it becomes depends one the hands that harvest it: the longevity of the end product depends on it’s usefulness.

Regardless of who harvests it or what it becomes, every cotton boll must go through some processing to realise it’s true potential.

So whether you’re a pair of jeans (covering nakedness, promoting style) or a cotton bud (wiping dirt/wax, renewing optimum function and hygiene) one thing is certain it’s not the length of your life that will matter, but the attainment of your maximum potential.

Some cotton bolls are unfortunate, dying before leaving the field, killed by fires (terrorists attacks e.g Paris yesterday, wars), destroyed by natural disasters (miscarriages, still born), for these we mourn and for them we must endeavour to live the best we can, remembering that life is a strange, but wonderful gift.

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Hi there, thank you for stopping by today. This is the eleventh edition of my ‘life is’ series where I try to relate life to different things in society. Would love to hear your thoughts on life is … a cotton boll.