The nurturant

Like a seamstress fastens patterns

with pins, the nurturant fastens our home

together even when it pricks.

Pins on marri wood cheese platter

A continuation from yesterday:

Three, the belief that religion is a psychological or business tool. Religion as a tool should guide the soul through life’s exploration reining in its reckless ways, strengthening its very core; its humanity. Religion as a tool should not exploit the soul or rape it of its humanity.

I pray a nurturant would guide my soul,

I pray I guide another soul as a nurturant would.

Four, the belief that nature hates the black man and fails to deliver what we ask for. We can’t expect the cosmos to give us what we have not earned. We cannot blame nature for our failure to recognize our solutions due to our impatient and inability to defer gratification. 

I pray a nurturant would guide our country to el dorado,

I pray we gain the insight to embrace a nurturant,

to refining change that starts within.

Our home is not useless, it is misguided by mercenary minds at the hem of affairs. 

Our home is not useless, it needs a nurturant.

Written for TJ Paris haiku challenge – pins.

and the A to Z challenge word for today is nurturant.


The hagglers creed

Thou shall attempt to get the best deals, at the best affordable price at all times.

As a devout haggler, thou must learn to shop patiently and practice the act of delayed gratification.

Thou shall uphold the hagglers’ code, tis thy skill to live within your means.


As a child I looked forward to going shopping with ma, it meant I got to pick what snack or fruit I wanted.  The experience however was tainted by the number of hours we ended up spending. It wasn’t because ma was slow quite the opposite, time was spent haggling. For every major shopping Ma had a list; we negotiated the market from the entrance closest to the essential things on it. This was done to ensure we used our best haggling skills before exhaustion set in.  So the stage is set, off we go to the first stall:

Trader: good afternoon o aunty

 Ma: Nne/Nna good afternoon. Ego ne ka I na ere tomatoes’ gi a? (How much is your tomatoes?)

Trader: ofu aka bu N50.00 (a single pile N50.00)

 Ma: ha! nna price gi gbako te kwa.  Ele kwa N20.00? (My dear, your price is high can you sell them for N20.00) initially, ma’s first price option often shocked me.

 Trader: mba o, (chuckles) last price bu N30.00 (no final price is N30.00)

 Ma: I ga ele ibuo N50.00 kamu gbolu ino? (Can you sell 2 for N50.00, I will take 4 bunches)

 Trader: ngwa nu ka obulu na ere kwa nke ta. (Ok, I will sell to you just so I can record a sale) 

That was the deal closed, the process is repeated for every single item. Some traders didn’t take kindly to the haggling and we left hastily from such stalls. When I got older it became my turn to go shopping and I felt immensely proud every time I came home and ma beamed with smiles at the good deals I struck. And when I struck out she would say “they saw you coming” not in those same words, but you get the general idea.

With few open markets where I live now, it would seem my haggling skills have been for naught. An amusing scene would be to walk into Tesco pick two cans of corn beef then proceed to haggle at the till. That would definitely make a good sketch for an anti-integration comedy. However, my husband has taught me a good use for my skill. Shop online, use comparison sites to get good bargains, to further increase the bargain search for vouchers/ coupons and Voi la! I still uphold the hagglers’ creed.

In the US, I believe the use of coupons is common place and worth more for a haggler. From what I gather they are good at helping families budget and maximize their incomes. They are acquired from magazines, newspapers and online some can be used several times over. It is also advisable where ever you live to shop in bulk and get frozen foods as well rather than fresh. Cashing in on sales especially when shopping for children’s items is ideal as they often wreck whatever you buy within a short period of time it helps to get them. Getting club cards/ bonus point cards from shops also helps, in the long run.

People associate haggling with being skint, this is far from true. No one likes to be taken advantage of and buying things at asking price without doing a comparative survey seems like that to me. Another misconception is that the seller loses out when we haggle, again this is wrong. Traders never go for deals that make them losses.

So if you are a good haggler like me don’t give up yet, just get more computer savvy and surf the net often for good deals. It never hurts to save a little here and there. You can still duplicate your life back home anywhere in the world with less sweat or exhaustion just a lot more planning.


Take a look at these sites:


A restless soul.

PHOTO PROMPT - © Dee Lovering

Jaden sat on the steps looking out at the harbour, thoughts racing through his mind.

Why wasn’t he ready?

Why did stability scare him so much?

Revamping the Orlando food chain was the biggest challenge he had ever undertaken, one he had hoped to cure him of his wanderlust. He had even invested money into it breaking the first code of a travelling chef.

All for naught! He wasn’t ready to settle just yet ,so like his ancestors he would leave Zaragoza on the first of July for New Zealand. Unlike his ancestors his wandering was self imposed.

In response to the writing challenge hosted by Rochelle, we are provided with the  picture and asked to write a story inspired by it. Word count should not exceed a 100 words. Click on the link to find other stories.

Thank you for stopping by.

Impact on the next generation: Fiction/Pop culture.

When perplexed by what present day society classifies as normal in relationships, I find my perspective by resorting to creative thinking ” Imagine you were living your perfect life everything is going your way and you were confident. No crazy hormones, head firmly in sync with heart. In walks a sexy cute guy, the one that looks like his not even trying to be hot but then he opens his month and says the words of the song or acts in the way the hero in a book/ movie did. Would you still think the situation ideal? What would your reaction be? Would you proudly play out that scene in front of an impressionable mind? if you would then enjoy. A very easy system for detecting the trash out there.

A lot of today’s songs and movies go against the grains of what society should embrace as suitable for young people. Classifying 50 shades of grey as romantic and suitable for 12/13-year-old (depending on where you live) is what I have issues with, the rest of what it depicts, I leave each to their own. In my mind romance is created by two people who respect each others individuality but also their decision to be together. No ones views are superior to the other, each motivates the other to be better. It’s a balanced mix of give and take. No superiors,no inferiors. Don’t get me wrong there might be a leader but not one that is possessive or controlling. I find that 50 shades of grey depicts quite the opposite of romance.

Here are some reviews of 50 shades of grey book and movie worth considering:

“One argument that baffled me was this idea that 50 Shades is just a book and only fantasy, to assert that any book that’s sold that many copies is just a story, in my POV, is naive and ignores almost all of human history. Societies have always been defined and redefined by its stories. Fiction IS NOT INERT.” By Kristen Lamb

“At this point I am thinking, okay everything that is happening in this movie is freaking ridiculous and how can women enjoy this crap.This movie is extremely bad, it’s what you get when Nickelodeon decides to venture into the world of pornography. I have paid money to sit in a movie theatre and watch garbage that is simultaneously destroying my brain cells, perpetuating the Prince Charming myth, decreasing my faith in humanity and portraying women as irrational and incompetent.” By Yves Edwards.

Reviews of the book:

The New Zealand Herald stated that the book “will win no prizes for its prose” and that “there are some exceedingly awful descriptions,” but it was also an easy read; “(If you only) can suspend your disbelief and your desire to – if you’ll pardon the expression – slap the heroine for having so little self-respect, you might enjoy it

“At least people are reading. You’ve no doubt heard that before. But we don’t say of the diabetic obese, At least people are eating.” Source:

Pretty woman would be my idea of romance.  In the movie Richard Gere has the wealth, looks, mannerism and confidence that accompanies his social status. Julia Roberts on the other hand though not wealthy walks with the same confidence, she knows what she wants out of life.Equal powers, equal rights. None superior, none inferior. She does learn a lot about social etiquette during her time with Richard but leaves when she starts to feel unhappy with the situation. Richard ddecides to pursue her and does so knowing she has the right to say no.  

Many of us are still emerging from the myth of a prince charming who saves us from every harm and creates a cushy luxurious future to the realities of love fostered by two wholesome individuals. We owe it to the coming generation to be careful what myth we create today through fiction. Don’t always think everyone would see your perspective or do the right thing in reality. The chances of one person misinterpreting you exists every time.This presentation of romance for a teenager can be disastrous. That’s all am saying.

Do children still play?

By: Jenna Louden

 My favourite memories of childhood consists mostly of playtime outdoors, cooking play food, using sand for rice, red stones for meat, grass for vegetables, an old milk tin for pot and large stones as a burner. I took pleasure in gathering my ingredients and feeding my dolls afterwards like ma fed me. As I grew older though outdoor play took up more energetic forms. There were so many games to pick from: swell ( similar to hopscotch), red light:green light, Simon says, jump rope, ncho/ayo (also known as Mancala, Oware, Awale in other places), “oga”/ “ten-ten”, hide and seek,” chaser”, mkpumkpu ogene, onye ene anya n azu and  lots more.

The novelty of outdoor play for me lay in gathering materials for the game, having different friends/siblings to play with and changing the rules of play to suit us at anytime. Outdoor play fostered a sense of community spirit, any child could join in. We expended a lot of energy, enjoyed the fresh air, improvised new play apparatus, utilized our motor skills, and learnt to share all in the process of having fun.

Todays society has almost made outdoor play unattractive for kids,and difficult for parents to encourage. iPads, tablets, social media and mobile phones has replaced outdoor fun for kids of all ages. Houses with large outdoor play areas are a luxury and leaving your kids unsupervised outdoors today is similar to placing a juicy bait in plain sight. In Nigeria there are no free parks or play areas, whilst these exist in the UK many  are under serious review for funding which might lead to closures. In both cases however parents rarely have the time outside work to take kids for play and finding a reliable place and playmates for them is a treasure.

As society evolves we must endeavour to keep certain things for posterity’s sake. Outdoor play stripes away financial requirements,    class or societal barriers. Technology has  no  soul or  mind, interacting with it or through it  constantly limits our exposure to  the various shades of the human mind. It impairs our ability to assess situations as they unfold. it will remain a second hand substitute for aiding human growth and development. It definitely won’t create fun memories to look back on, for those you need to get up and live.

We all need those memories of scruffy jeans, falling of the bike, climbing up the tree, messy hair and missing tooth smiles with friends who look the same. I   hope we do our best to encourage constructive play.




Meaning: study of a loving home



Has its roots in latin. Comprises of three words

Amans means loving

Domus means home

Logy means study

Casamoroslogy: has its roots in the spanish language.

Casa means home

Amoroso means loving

Logy means study

A loving home is aptly but simply described by timon and pumba:  A home is where your rump rests.

It doesn’t have to be grand or exotic but it should  be safe, warm and filled with treasured memories that shape us; happy or sad.

If your backside can’t comfortably rest there, then it isn’t a loving home.

I hope we all have loving and happy homes.

“Play Lexicographer.”

Through the eyes of a migrant.

The world has gradually become a global community with no walls. The figure for international migrants globally reached 232 million, up from 175 million in 2000 ( This raises issues of economic, social and political importance for countries world over.

They spun the tale of a distant land, vibrant with prospects and new life. With features bespoke of aristocrats and soft voices belied by authority it was no wonder the elders bought their vision. Many followed both free and bond, willing and unwilling. We bought their way, but not the principles for navigating that way. It was impressive tales for so many still follow the trail in quest of a better tomorrow. Some do so blindly whilst others planned for it. For some, the tale is the only hope for life with a future.

In the first decades after WWII, colonial ties to a large degree shaped UK immigration. Due to long-established social, cultural and economic ties, citizens of Commonwealth countries have well-established networks that facilitate further inflows by lowering costs and risks of migration (Massey et al. 1998). There is sound empirical evidence that networks and cultural and historical links have a robust and strong positive effect on migration (Pedersen et al 2008, Mayda 2009).

And so they reached their destination beaming of hope, happy to have arrived safely. Some smiled in welcome, some with scrawls, others smiled but spat in anger privately. Not long before they realised that the die had been cast in order to survive they had to dance to the pipers’ tune. . It was a huge mind shift, a change on so many fronts natural and man-made. Like a misfit at a party, they must be ready to bear the brunt for any misconduct.

The experience of each migrant differs and is affected by the following age, income level, type of visa, time in the UK, household size, available resources, and rights in the UK. The UK imposes limitations on access to public benefits for a large percentage of immigrants, but it seems the vast majority of the public is unaware of this. In most instances, recent migrants from outside the European Economic Area (EEA) cannot claim social housing benefits. Limitations placed on asylum seekers makes them legally unable to work, but they are nonetheless identified as scroungers.

We were willing and ready to work for our living though some had hoped for money off trees. Desirous to create a better tomorrow but marginalised by certain policies our hopes stayed alive. We haven’t come this far to go back the same. It was understandable when some frowned at us, not every child in a household welcomes strangers with open arms. But judging everyone as “bloody immigrants taking our jobs” was not fair. Neither was the swift wave of frenzy raised by politicians about immigration fair. It keeps people in the dark regarding the real problems and facts.

When migrants compare the limited economic opportunity back home to their working life in the UK they were prepared to tolerate poor pay and working conditions. Often taking up jobs they would never have done back home. With time, they became more aware of their rights as workers. New arrivals, especially from A8 countries, planned to get jobs better suited to their skills when they become proficient English speakers. As casual workers migrants are often exploited and didn’t help social integration. When communities feel a locality belonged to them chances were higher of immigration being blamed for problems which existed long ago. In these areas, immigrants are expected to integrate solely by themselves. This occurred less often in communities where migration and cultural diversity were acknowledged as part of everyday life. People expected their locality to include people ‘from here’ and ‘from elsewhere’ thus making it easy for migrants to integrate.

Immigration is one of those topics that will keep evolving over time and would probably never have one parallel satisfactory answer for all parties (residents and migrants). No man is an island neither is any nation, as global partnerships/markets grow so will diplomatic relationships and migration.


Click to access MAC-Migrants_in_low-skilled_work__Full_report_2014.pdf

Same for all,soil is home.

Sefton park liverpool
Same for all,soil is home.

According to science different life forms have existed on the earths soil for a long time.

From the era of dinosaurs to present day, the soil has served as home to them all.

Home to ant,home to elephant. Home to man,home to apes. Home to weeds,home to trees.

Underneath or above, submerged by water or right under open skies, the soil is home to all.

Through sunny spells and rainy days, all life forms at home are touched.

Same for all, same for all.

The soil is home for all, for each it gives its best.

Same for all.

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Free Association.”

life’s luggage

                                  In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “A Moment in Time.”


Each life has a course it must follow, a journey to complete.

We all start with one luggage,our body.

On our peregrination through life, we acquire new luggage and drop some others.

Each piece of luggage tells a story, each excess one impedes our progress.

Whether you are returning home or going away, shed the excess luggage (both figuratively and literally) to increase your speed.