Welcome to Flavoured Friday Fodder; today’s edition is centred around the common topic of first impressions and how they shape future encounters.
Beautiful shapely porcelain coloured legs, clad in a pair of high riding fashionable stiletto boots. A pleasant sight until you caught a glimpse of bare bottom covered by what can only be described as a hint of a skirt. It came as no surprise when the lads walking behind refused to walk any faster than her. It was an amusing site to see from all angles, spicing up a boring wait at the traffic lights. The site triggered off a wave of laughter shared by myself and two other drivers waiting at the light. At 12 noon on a Saturday, it was a pleasant site for sore eyes.
As we laughed, my mind formed instant opinions of the lady in question; a typical “blond Barbie”, probably ditzy, all “show” but no substance, constantly in need of attention. I hadn’t even meet her, nor did we exchanged pleasantries; didn’t know her at all but my mind had issued a firm judgement regarding her. This is what we do unconsciously; it goes on to affect our behaviour and relationship with the individual.
Our brains find it easy to engage this way; several stereotypes exist in our mind making it easy for our brains to snap up one in an instance once we see/meet someone. Our minds immediately fits the individual into the slot in our brain where we feel they should belong. Some of these stereotypes are founded on past experiences, the theory is if XYZ acted in a certain way, when I meet ABC who looks similar to XYZ, our brains by default immediately assumes that ABC will act just the same. Am presently learning to understand that all XYZ has in common with ABC is that they are alphabets. Z can never replace A in a word e.g. CZN neither can A replace Z e.g. AENITH.
People might share certain traits straight off and we are entitled to form an opinion about them. The situation however becomes tricky when we let those opinions blind us to really personality which starts to shine true over time. The last few years has been a humbling and informative time for me, learning to approach new people with the above mindset has saved me some heart-ache.
But we mustn’t forget “people will treat you based on how you present yourself”
“It’s okay to dislike someone, or even to dislike someone for no reason, but it’s not okay to disrespect, degrade, or humiliate that person.” Sandra Bullock.
Till next time…. be safe.